I did came back from my vacation happy, relaxed and refreshed, but as I hurriedly got back into my usual life, some unexpected news hit my face with a splat. Sorry, it was more of a THUD. When I heard about the news, I couldn't breathe and that unexplainable pain was there again. I had to put on an unaffected face and told my friends I am absolutely fine, but deep within, my heart felt like a wobbly, melting jelly served on a sizzling platter. My ex got engaged. ("That SOB got engaged," was how it sounded in my head.)
How could someone, that you've been with for years decide to break up with you, but marry a girl he only knew for a year? I can't fathom any explanation to this, and I felt sick thinking that maybe I wasn't marriage material. It sucks, but it's a plausible explanation. I am going through some emotional turmoil right now; it's not as bad as it sounds (really), but I've been unable to concentrate on anything. I went from super high to super low, so if I don't update my blog for a few days, blame it on that SOB ex.
I'm so sorry for the language. Chocolates, anyone?
Sigh. Although I believe that there are some people who are destined to get married, not get married, destined to just be parents, destined for motherhood/fatherhood but not good enough to be a partner, I think it's not fair to conclude that you're not a marriage material. It's an old tune but I'd still say, we have our own match. Trust God's perfect time.
ReplyDelete"How could someone, that you've been with for years decide to break up with you, but marry a girl he only knew for a year?" - I said (almost) the same thing years ago. Can I hug you? Take care, Kayni.
wits, thank you. there are some things, i guess, that needs no explanation. time can only tell what happens next.
ReplyDeleteSending lots of chocs and ice-cream your way... Look at it this way, you haven't found the lid to your pot yet :) Besides, it is his loss... stay strong! Hugs, xx
ReplyDeleteP.S. Reading suggestion: "Outlander" by Diana Gabaldon
I'm buying you a cyber martini, how does that sound?
ReplyDeleteonce of the mysteries of life yet again. i hope you don't blame yourself or think that there's something wrong with you. some people just don't belong together. :(
ReplyDeletehugs for you, kayni. and hope you will feel better, soon. i'll say a prayer for you. :)
Lailaa, thanks. i like that - lid and pot...lol. will check out Gabaldon's book.
ReplyDeletePhoto Cache...cyber matini sounds awesome.
Kg, thank you so much. no, i don't blame myself, and you're right, some people aren't meant to be together.
there's somebody much better for you, Kayni...seriously... you're just not meant for each other and that's OK..
ReplyDeletehugging you..
Vitchie, I agree...I think I am dealing more with the shock. You're right...it's okay.
ReplyDeletekayni, somebody once told me this: it's better to have loved and lost than to get stuck with a jerk (in your case, an SOB).
ReplyDeletelike what vitchie said. it just wasn't meant to be.
stay strong, kayni..
i've experienced the same thing, although it wasn't really that painful to me as I've somehow moved on when it happened. but the news still is shocking. i am really sad for you; i have no words really. but i know you will soon rise above this, and maybe find a guy who also thinks he's not marriage material but will find himself marrying you. haha. smile ka naman! :)
ReplyDeleteAngeli, Thank you. I will.
ReplyDeleteMordsith, =)..Oo smile na...lol. Thank you.
Kayni, you're better off without him. I know this might not sound so good right now but someday soon you'll hear yourself say that. I know He has nothing but good and BETTER plans for you.
ReplyDeleteThat is indeed one of life's many mysteries. I have a few friends who were in the same boat. I guess he isn't meant for you but don't lose hope there is someone out there for you. Better buy a flashlight and search for him, he might be lost. Sorry I was just kidding! Hope you feel better by now, Kayni. *hugs*
ReplyDeleteI was once told that relationships should never last more than two years. Either you two get married or go separate ways.
ReplyDeleteI love you and a big tight hug...
P.S. Can i repost that Steve Harvey interview? Thankies!
awww, kayni, {{{hugs}}} dear!
ReplyDeletei would echo Jo's comment, trust God's perfect time.
it's ok to hurt and mourn, and you'll get over it soon. you both are just not meant to be, and i know someone will come along in the future, and you'll be grateful you're rid of the sob ex. ^-^
Rico, I look forward to the better plans. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteDaphne, I was laughing at your comment. I might really need a flashlight...lol. Hugs back.
Kero, Oh yes, please repost. I love you and thank you so much.
Miss Firefly, You said it so well - God's perfect time. Thank you.
oh so sorry, this sounds just like in a movie sad to say say they do happen in real life.... time heals all wounds..
ReplyDeleteToni, I'd prefer to see this in a movie rather than happening to me...lol. Thank you.
ReplyDeletehi Kayni! i'm a late bloomer when it comes to country songs... like, i only heard about Garth Brooks in 1998... anyway, he has a song entitled UNANSWERED PRAYERS...
ReplyDeletehere are 2 lines from the chorus:
Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers...
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers..
i always emerged the loser in any relationships i entered. i always thought the problem was with me. but when i finally met the man who said he cant live without me, i really prayed to thank God for not answering my prayers before but for answering me in His time....
Jehan, Thank you so much. I am feeling much better these days. Yes, I've heard of this song =).
ReplyDelete*awww* sad to hear this kayni. Hope you feel better soon. Things happen for a reason. Have faith. He might have a better plan for you. Hugs to you my dear.
ReplyDeleteEverything happens for a reason Kayni. I've been there and you're right, only time can tell but rest assured that it'll come to pass.
ReplyDeleteJust hang in there. :)
I hope you're feeling better now Kayni.
ReplyDeleteI also thought I wasn't marriage material before and I sincerely believed it. But now, I am happily married. I am sure the right one will come along for you. Hugs
Blue Rose, Hugs back. I am better. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteLene, I'm still hanging in here =).
Josiet, I agree. Thank you.
hugs babe. sigh, we can never really fathom the way a man's head works---and they say we're complicated no? hahaha! double hugs!
ReplyDeletecpsanti, i agree. it's a misconception...men are as complicated as women. thank you for the double hugs =).
ReplyDeletei'd be more surprised if you didn't feel anything. regardless of how long he knew you and the other party, it's pretty normal to feel "slighted" when this happens, esp. if you're still single. cheer up. it'll pass... :)
ReplyDeleteonyxx, thank you. i am starting to feel okay again. it will pass.
ReplyDeletethings will be better kayni! hugssss!
ReplyDeleteremember: good things come to those who wait. :)
dyanie, thank you. i agree.
ReplyDeleteoh, honey.... i am so sorry i just read this... i hope you understand- i had my hands full with jack (and no help) and then my family flying over to visit (there were 7 of them and the age range is from 4- 71 years old.. so you can imagine)
ReplyDeleteplease don't think that (i.e. you not marriage material)- that is BS. you are a warm and lovely person- and one AH ex-fiance does not take that away. h
ug-hug-hug darling.